Saturday, March 28, 2009

I hate when people eff with my computer

OK, so for a few weeks now, the printer will not work. Says it is online, says it is working. Well, in fact, NO! it is not working. If it's not printing, I would say that means that the printer is not working. If the name of what you should do is in your name and you are not doing that thing, than there is a problem.
So, I have unplugged.
I have rebooted.
I have dusted. (hey...it needed to be dusted back behind there anyways. I do it at least twice a year.)
I have spoken nicely. Whispered sweet nothings to it.
I have yelled. Even cursed.

Guess what the problem was? Someone, and I know who this someone is. This someone was in my home resetting my computer modem with a "new, better modem" a few weeks ago. Right around the same time the printer stopped working.....
The cable guy unplugged my printer from the printer plug and plugged it into the webcam plug. wtf? I don't even have a webcam.
And I had to laugh when I pulled my computer out and looked at the back.... this Dell really is made for idiots. (no comments, please) There are not only names for each plug, as in..."Monitor", but there is also a little picture of the monitor. So there's no confusion as to what gets plugged in where.
I guess my cable guy either 1) cannot read words or pictures or 2) does this shit for kicks to see how many gray hairs he can cause to 30 something women trying to figure out why their printer stopped printing.

I can now stop talking to my printer. It is working as it should. Continue with your day.....

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

the joy of Pokemon Platinum

will be known at my house later today. my oldest is getting an award today, he is a "Terrific Kid". (and yes, I already knew this...he is pretty terrific, but he is getting this today from being nominated by his classmates)


all he has wanted since Sunday, when this new DS game came out, is the game. Pokemon. Pokemon. Pokemon.
Pikachu.
Ash.
Team Rocket.
These are all names I now know.
Pokemon Happiness in a 9 yr old.....

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Take 2 Motrin and call me in the morning

so, I guess Thursdays are tough when you're in Kindergarten. I picked them up, was #6in car pick-up line. (YES! I think that's my best time yet! I think some of these other Moms live at school and are #1 and #2 constantly...but that's another post, I'm sure)picked up my paycheck, went to the bank, Target and home.
my daughter told me that she was tired. that was my first clue that somthing was up. 5 year olds do not announce their fatigue. they go go go go go and then they drop to the floor and fall asleep.
then she asked if she could change into jammies when we got home. in case she fell asleep, she'd already be in jammies. I can't argue with that logic, so I said that was fine.
we got home, she immediately went to her room and changed into her jammies and appeared 5.2 seconds later on the couch.
and then she said it.....
"can I have 2 Motrin and just take it easy today? I had a rough day."

what could have happened in Kindergarten that was so rough? but, I got her the Motrin and juice. her blankies. a cold rice pack for her head. and put on Thumbelina. she's happy now.

we all have those days. even at 5.....

Friday, March 6, 2009

give me strength

she is 5. the hormaonal fluctuations should not be hitting her yet. right?
she just may be manic.

I swear this child can go from happy-happy to mad as a cow in line at the slaughterhouse in 3 seconds flat.

and what was the latest fit over?
was she forced to eat liver and onions?
was she forced to remove any and all pink accessories from her outfit?
did her brother pee in her Cheerios?

nope....the offense was heinous. it was awful. it was life altering, for sure.

she was asked if she wanted plain water or half juice, half water in her water bottle for school.

yes, come and arrest me now and take me away. I am a horrible mother.
no, really...you can come and get me. I'll be available for at least another 45 minutes before the errands begin.
you have mapquest, right?

Thursday, March 5, 2009

whaaaaaaaaaaattt did you say?

I think perhaps Hell hath frozen over and pigs are currently flying out of my butt.
last night, during dinner, which of course the 2 older Littles refused and picked at because "the rice looks different"...wtfever, kids. I made it. I cooked. I'm eating it. so what if it looks a little "different"(cooked in crock pot so it was a bit more mushy than the norm).
and, btw, the man is such a nonhelper in these situations. when will he learn to keep his mouth shut or simply say, "your Mom is right"? 15 years of training and you know what came out of his mouth? "hmm, I see what you're talking about. the rice is a little different. but, you should try it. I put extra butter on it and it's pretty much OK tasting." NO NO NO!!!!!! do NOT give them validation that simply because the rice is cooked differently than just plain old boiling water that there may be some issue with the rice being edible. do NOT tell them that by adding 5 tablespoons of butter to 1 serving of rice is acceptable!

anyways, once we got over the whole rice issue, my oldest child said the best thing EVER!

"Momma, I really think we need to go to bed early tonight."

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (sound of Heavens singing the joys of the blessings of children)

hot damn! (probably shouldn't mention damn and Heaven so closely, huh? sorry God)

so the man and I had an exciting night planned of.....catching up on movies. we have HBO and something else for free right now, so we thought, "hey! we could actually watch an R rated movie tonight!"
you know what we realized? we haven't been missing much. all of these years of putting movies off until DVD release and then forgetting about them...no biggie.

we watched "Unbreakable" with Samuel L. Jackson and Bruce Willis and Sean Penn's wife.
SUCKED

then we watched the Fantastic 4 Part Two...Surfer something guy.
SUCKED

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

growth spurts and Twilight

how do these 2 things correspond to one another? let me tell ya.
I have not read Twilight in any shape or form(meaning no, not even my ipod version with the freaky ass woman who makes Edward sound totally gay and creepy with that scene after the blood typing that they LEFT OUT OF THE MOVIE and he says..."Bellllaaaaaaaaaa"...sort of like he is is trying to add more syllables to the name, I dunno, maybe it's just me, but I do not like that chick's voice) in about 3 weeks. gasp. yes, 3 weeks have gone by and have not been found sitting on my ass with a book open and a nice glass of wine and maybe a girl scout cookie or 2 nearby. well, eff the cookies, I'll save my calories for an extra glass of wine, thankyouverymuch.
anyways, I decided to start reading Twilight again. well, I CAN'T read New Moon because my niece has had it forever and a day and must think her college courses requiring reading are more important than her Aunt's slight fixation on these books. but fine. whatever. see who loves you? just wait and see who brings you nada back from Acciocon, girlfriend.
so I started reading it...not even really sure what time this would be. let's just say...a lot. and I tell you, my children decided then and there that they are starving and although they ate dinner about 20 minutes ago, they need and require more food or they will start the whining.
we had dinner.... I even cooked. (yes, I know...another collective gasp)
we had spaghetti with home-made meat sauce, salad, garlic bread. they each had a serving and ate it all. said they were full. said it was great. well, the littlest Little did not actually say it was great, but when he decided it was quicker to use 2hands to shove noodles into his mouth and seemed happy to be doing so, I took that as a 1 year old version of, "wow, Momma, this is an awesome dinner!"

OK, so I had JUST sat down and read like 5 pages when they entered...."we're hungry".
me- "do you want more dinner or would you like some dessert? we have ice cream for dessert, I was just going to wait until you took your showers and then give you some..."
big Little-"I'd like a hamburger."
middle Little-"can we go to Steak 'n Shake?"
me-"umm, no, we cannot go to S 'n S. we just ate dinner. did you forget that meal we just ate, sitting in the kitchen at the table, all together?"
"I have extra spaghetti and bread and salad, why don't I fix you another plate?"

big Little-"do we have steak?"
middle Little-"can we go out for Chinese?"

I'm seeing that they are not interested in more spaghetti.

"no, we do not have steak right now, and no, we cannot go out for Chinese right now. maybe we can go out for Chinese another night this week. and maybe Daddy can grill steaks another night. but for now, how about an apple?"

"do we have ice cream?"
and this is where I start twitching and looking at my book and thinking that life in Forks couldn't be all that bad.

but I cut up 2 apples, got out some cheese sticks and grapes, and a spoonful of peanut butter for the littlest Little(he hadn't bathed yet anyways, so a little peanut butter in his hair was no biggie)and they ate. and then I put little man into the bath tub and the older 2 had ice cream. and then at about 7:55PM, the big Little said that he really did want some more spaghetti and he proceeded to eat the remaining spaghetti that was supposed to be his Dad's lunch for the next day.
this child goes for weeks barely eating. nibbling on this or that, never a member of the clean plate club. and then, BAM! I pick up Twilight and he becomes an eating machine.

yet just another example of the magic that is Twilight.